How to participate in the ultimate marriage
In college I knew a person who was a film major. His dream was to work directing Christian films. One of the things he took delight in was showing how movies could be classified into one of about ½ dozen plots. A great move would come out and he would say, oh, that’s plot X. It’s just like the movie a, and b, and c. I would never have linked those movies together, but after he explained how they worked, it always seemed to make sense. I have to say, this took some of the fun out of watching a movie.
One of the plots is this:
A character needs a certain relationship. But, there are problems that keep that character from experiencing that relationship. The problem must be overcome, and usually a change must occur so that the character can experience the relationship that he or she was meant to experience.
It’s the plot of pride and prejudice. Elizabeth Bennet was prejudice and Mr. Darcy was prideful. Both had to change so that they could have a relationship with one another. This is also the plot for just about every romantic comedy.
Why is this plotline so popular? Why do we love movies where the characters yearn for, and then finally achieve a relationship which gives them a sense of satisfaction and meaning? Why do we love it, even though we know full well that in real life it never works out that way? Dave Harvey, one of my favorite speakers on Marriage, said that he wants them to come out with Pride and Prejudice part II: return from the honeymoon. We know romance in the movies is not like real life, but we are still swept up by stories of people meeting their true love and living happily ever after. Why do you think that is?
I think because that’s the same story we find ourselves in, in real life. We are longing for relationship, but not yet able to experience that relationship in full. We are trying to figure out what must be changed in us or in the other person so that we can experience a relationship that we were meant to experience.
So what must change? Our looks? Our personality? Our image?
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